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Jan. 22nd, 2007 09:24 pmOk, so I am officially my own worst enemy.
I've had the day off from work, which is nice, and what have I done with it?
Sweet fuck all is the answer. Well, sweet fuck all and go to the doctor, but that was the whole point of having today off, since it was too damn painful to go into work.
I could have spent the day writing, working on Touched and building up the timelines so that I don't fuck it all up when I actually get to writing those parts. No, once again I sat on my arse and did nothing.
I am so good at doing this, but from here on in it stops. If I want to get this damn book written I am going to have to have a little more self discipline than I've currently got, and if that takes hard work and focus, well I will be the better for it. I need to get this book written, I've got so many of the scenes planned out and I desperatly need to get them put down on paper before they get lost in the noise of plot-bunnies and scrambled with other scenes. Like I said, I am my own worst enemy.
Otherwise, things are going pretty well, even if I did sleep like crap last night. I won't say I slept like shit, I know there are people out there who sleep so much worse than I ever could, but it has left me lethargic and a little on the grumpy side. Oh for the days when I used to be able to go to sleep at 3/4am, be up for 6:30am and not feel it.
Is it wrong to miss my insomnia? Even if it was only protoinsomnia?
The argument that Kaz and I had yesterday seems to have cleared the air a lot. Its the first time I've gotten truely angry at her and not burst into tears (I was crying already), and actually accepted the anger. It felt damn good. Not only that, but for once I haven't felt guilty for it.
Its a most freeing experience, one that I'd recommend to anyone. Get angry and actually feel it, then accept that it is your anger, you have a right to it and there is nothing to feel guilty about. I just wished I'd worked that out sooner.
I've had the day off from work, which is nice, and what have I done with it?
Sweet fuck all is the answer. Well, sweet fuck all and go to the doctor, but that was the whole point of having today off, since it was too damn painful to go into work.
I could have spent the day writing, working on Touched and building up the timelines so that I don't fuck it all up when I actually get to writing those parts. No, once again I sat on my arse and did nothing.
I am so good at doing this, but from here on in it stops. If I want to get this damn book written I am going to have to have a little more self discipline than I've currently got, and if that takes hard work and focus, well I will be the better for it. I need to get this book written, I've got so many of the scenes planned out and I desperatly need to get them put down on paper before they get lost in the noise of plot-bunnies and scrambled with other scenes. Like I said, I am my own worst enemy.
Otherwise, things are going pretty well, even if I did sleep like crap last night. I won't say I slept like shit, I know there are people out there who sleep so much worse than I ever could, but it has left me lethargic and a little on the grumpy side. Oh for the days when I used to be able to go to sleep at 3/4am, be up for 6:30am and not feel it.
Is it wrong to miss my insomnia? Even if it was only protoinsomnia?
The argument that Kaz and I had yesterday seems to have cleared the air a lot. Its the first time I've gotten truely angry at her and not burst into tears (I was crying already), and actually accepted the anger. It felt damn good. Not only that, but for once I haven't felt guilty for it.
Its a most freeing experience, one that I'd recommend to anyone. Get angry and actually feel it, then accept that it is your anger, you have a right to it and there is nothing to feel guilty about. I just wished I'd worked that out sooner.
